Despite having some roller coaster experiences all at once near the end of last year I came into 2012 with much optimism. For the most part, the positive attitude has done well for me.

As part of my vow to be optimistic, I told myself that I would be open to developing all kinds of new relationships and work on keeping myself well socialized and motivated in work. Work took a turn for the better, out of much anticipation and waiting the outcome was good and I was reminded of how supportive and loving my closest friends and family really are. Best of all, my family and I had a chance to spend 10 days in Hawaii together learning to find a new appreciation for one another and really embrace the bond that we have, which I think was critical for us after the loss we all just suffered only months ago.

What I began to realize over the last little while is that when I am riding on high vibes and busy living my life, I end up having less time to worry about petty things. Keeping busy really is important, within reason and balance of course. I don’t recall ever feeling so content and generally comfortable with myself and the direction in which my life is moving. Knowing you can make it  through such a tulumtuous time and still have much to be thankful for and much to love about life when you get out of the rut makes it hard for one to stay pessimistic long.

Although I believe I have become more comfortable and content with the way things are, I wonder if it also works against me a tad? I have grown really impatient with people I don’t care to occupy my time with and those who evidently feel that way in regards to me. I have always been a multiple chances for redemption, wait around on  people and wait for them to come to me kind of person but I know now that isn’t fair to me. I am not going to evolve into some kind of introverted biatch but I just don’t feel like it is any longer necessary to waste time on relationships and situations that aren’t worth it. I have learned how fortunate I am to have many wonderful people and things to focus my energy on all around me, why would I bother with those situations I don’t feel comfortable with or those people who can’t dignify me with mutual respect?

Even as I write this blog I question how much time is necessary to spend talking about things that piss me off or that aren’t worth my time. I am turning over a new leaf, one I think I vowed to in some aspect or another once before, but one I am now deeply committed to. The future is bright and mine to make of it what I wish, why wouldn’t I want to be stoked about that?

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